4 Steps to Learning More as a Busy Mom
Maybe you would never call yourself a teacher but we’ve all experienced teaching someone else in one form or fashion.
Generally, your words are gentle, instruction abounds with every fleeting minute, patience tries to rise up meeting the student where they’re at. Then there is the emotional reward when someone you’re teaching finally… catches… on.
This time, you are the student.
These same feelings will be your compass in this adventure. It won’t be perfect. You won’t enjoy every minute of it. The difference is that NOW it’s an INVESTMENT IN YOURSELF.
As a mom, this is the moment you’ve been waiting for!
Moving Backward
On this podcast episode of Superage: Live Better, Bradley Schurman discusses how we sometimes look at our aging process as a form of defeat. That can fall into the trap of thinking we must “lower the bar” when it comes to activities, adventure, our continued story.
Bradley goes on to say, “If you’re not moving forward, you’re moving backward.”
When I coach my mom clients on the ski slopes, 90% of my time teaching is all about psychology. They are afraid they will slide backwards. I am there to assure them I can teach them to move forward.
YOUR biggest blockade is the same as theirs; YOUR BRAIN.
Your primal brain is there to keep you safe, comfortable, and expend as little energy as possible. It is whispering, “Lower the bar. It’s easier if we just go backward and do what we know.” BUT the other part of your brain, your prefrontal cortex says, “If we don’t move forward we will never know what we’re capable of.”
4 Steps to Learning More as a Mom or Empty Nester
Just where does this leave you in the learning process as an empty nester, “superager”, or mom in the throws of aging and raising children?
Step #1: Just Keep Moving
Even if you’re going “back and forth” on a decision for your next big dream, it DOESN’T MEAN YOU HAVE TO MOVE BACKWARDS. Find small ways to get started moving forward. Ways and things around you that will encourage you to move in a forward motion. Body and mind.
This can be one activity
like yoga that targets both at the same time
walking with a friend at a certain day, a certain time, even the same route each week
book club
wine club
poker club (one of my ski instructor girlfriends loves to play poker with her ladies group and sometimes they clean house!).
One step toward your dream is MOVING FORWARD.
Step #2: Know Your Learning Style
This should be a no-brainer for most of us that have raised children. At least that’s what we tend to think at first glance. But we’re talking about ourselves here ladies.
The women I coach on the ski slopes who are most successful in their learning are those that are able to articulate their learning style. Knowing your learning style starts with:
Speaking kind words to yourself as you jump into learning something. You are NOT dumb, or stupid. So don’t fall into a bad habit of calling yourself that as you begin your learning journey.
Take time to refresh your brain on the the VAK learning styles
Make a coffee date with a friend and discuss ways you both like to learn new things
Take note when you’re learning something new around the house, podcast, office, garden, church. Did your brain respond to the learning style or not of the facilitator?
Step #3: Trade The Multi-Tasking for Confidence
I know as a woman you think I’m crazy for suggesting this as a true step to learning, but hear me out.
Scientifically as our brain ages, it gets distracted more easily. It only makes sense that if we want to continue to learn more, we are going to need to give up the multi-tasking that us moms have become so use to.
When I was fighting giving up multi-tasking, I started asking myself questions like, “How often did I find myself feeling stressed during multi-tasking moments?”
I often felt stressed. Now I can honestly say that:
I feel like learning something new because I know I only have to focus on one thing
I feel more peace
I feel more accomplished
I feel more CONFIDENCE!
Try giving up multi-tasking for one day and notice if you too are experiencing more feelings of peace and confidence.
Step #4: Organize What You Want To Learn
I think this is my favorite step of all because I love to organize!
This can also be an overwhelming step for others. Organizing isn’t cut out for everyone. If you have a busy household with teens or young adults living in it, then the possibilities of just making time for yourself let alone organizing things you want to learn, can seem impossible!
Start easy like finishing a chapter of a book, or writing a one paragraph letter to a friend remembering a good time you had together.
Start small like blocking out 5 minutes for 3 days a week on your calendar to sit in your favorite chair and day dream.
Watch a free YouTube tutorial on how to use Google Calendar and start organizing your time
Watch a free YouTube tutorial on how to use Google Tasks and start organizing AND scheduling all your “to do’s”.
Remember, choosing just one thing is the best way to start small. It keeps your brain from being overwhelmed and allows you to keep moving forward.
A Backward Thought
One of my favorite anonymous quotes I live by and often say out loud to myself, “I didn’t just fail. I failed forward”.
We’re often afraid to try new things because we’re afraid of failure. We think it will send us backward in life, in accomplishments, in our learning process. But just ONE step forward, ONE new thought, ONE thing learned is MOVING FORWARD, not backward.
What matters most is you remind yourself that with every little thing, you are MOVING FORWARD IN YOUR LEARNING PROCESS.
P.S. Don’t forget to speak kind words to yourself. After all, words can sting, ESPECIALLY if they’re coming from ourselves.
